Every time they blur Rachel’s indecency, take a drink.

So, yeah, Rachel is HoH. What can you do? Well, if you’re Andrew, you can jump around until your yarmulke falls off in childish joy. I’m wondering if he’s really a podiatrist, because he seems more like a little kid who wanted to be a podiatrist, who found a special carnival toy and the next morning, he’s BIG! He then gets bitched out heinously for doing so by Britney, (who, I think, looks like a teeny, unhinged Dolly Parton). Be careful Britney, you might be yelling at a 12-year-old.

Rachel and Brendan cannot stop making out and wrapping their legs around each other and now they’re going to do it all over the HoH room all week. The feeds must be hopping.

Mensa and Butthole Mouth think Kristin is the hottest thing. You have to work harder than you would for, say, a regular girl, says Butthole. What’s a regular girl? A girl who doesn’t want to date a dude with two buttholes, I supposes.

Britney, as noisy and obnoxious as she is, has chosen the world’s most boring person as a best friend. They spent a lot of time alienating everyone else and yelling at people. I wonder if that’s going to end up being a problem later?

Mensa has a Mensa-level plan to announce to Rachel that he’s incredibly paranoid, because that would be a good way to get Rachel to…what? Be scared of him? Start to consider him a loose end? A time bomb? She doesn’t like the conversation and goes back to Brendan’s lap in the HoH room to discuss nominating him. Ah, Mensa.

Rachel explains the Have/Have Nots challenge that I cannot understand at all. I soon realize that three teams each taped a teammate to a wall, and the other people had to spray them with water and knock them down. The game is going swimmingly until Britney slips into a position that could actually kill her, so they take her down and her team loses. Wah Wah. But! Once they see it’s fishsticks they’ll be eating, they are happy. Fishsticks and fruitcake. And they are HAPPY.

After the Fishtick Fiesta, BB reveals that the Saboteur was Annie. They watch her goodbye video and then most decide to take credit for getting rid of the Saboteur in the first week. UM, YOU ALL THOUGHT IT WAS BRENDAN, IDIOTS. The mics and cameras? They RECORD things.

Rachel decided to nominate Britney and Monet (who is totally OVER Judaism, btw), which was pretty obvious from the beginning. I hope they get rid of Monet so she can go and not have any fun or do anything interesting somewhere else.

I’m starting to really want Brendan and Rachel to get to the end. I think pretty much everyone hates them already! I know Lydia from BB11 hates her…she’s been tweeting bad words about her. Words that start with C.