Russell is cracking my shit up and starting to be one of my favourites, despite the off-putting bodybuilding. And even though I don’t like Ronnie or Jessie, I think it’s hysterical that Russell terrorized Ronnie last week and then secretly reassured him that they have a secret alliance and he’s just playing it up. Ronnie has a horseshoe up his butt, IMO.

Okay, Lydia. Is an idiot. She has a crush on Jessie, and Jessie, who admits she’s cute, analyzes their similarities by comparing them to caterpillars. Enter Natalie, who seems to be Jessie’s best friend, and Lydia gets so jealous she can’t help but show it constantly. Jessie seems to me to be encouraging this, because of the way he had Natalie drape herself across the couch so that Lydia couldn’t get her seat back when she came back from the kitchen. I also think he’s playing the girls against each other since he supposedly had sex with Lydia two weeks ago.

Time for the Have/Have Not competition and this looked so fun I wanted to play, too. Jordan, Kevin and Chima zoomed around on these little motorized cart things while wearing goggles that impaired their vision. And then they got foam sprayed on them, which Jordan particularly enjoyed. Anyway, Jordan managed not to lose the game and didn’t have to go on slop again this week. Brains ended up being the Have Nots. When they came inside Ronnie was very excited about getting to also eat America’s Choice, cabbage and cocktail weenies. He loves cocktail weenies. So unsurprising. I was surprised, though, to see that the cabbage was raw. At least they can make some cole slaw. I was imagining they’d have canned, blandly cooked cabbage. Is there such a thing? Ew.

Nomination time. Jessie talks out loud to himself while he ceremoniously arranges the keys in the thingy. I was expecting a Casey/Jeff nomination, but instead Jessie nominated Michelle and Jordan. And he gave no reasons for doing so. I see a backdooring in the future.