Let’s get right to it: if you didn’t see Adam’s performance, stop reading this and go right to Hulu, YouTube, or Fox.com and watch it right exactly now. Go on. I’ll wait.

So, yeah, the idiots-in-charge of Idol were so flummoxed by cutting back to an hour for the performances that they let the stupid filler clips and judges’ yammer run long, thus causing Adam’s amazing performance of one of my favorite songs in the history of ever to be cut off entirely by TiVos/DVRs around the globe.  I even had mine set to record an extra couple of minutes…and still missed it.  Hate. Deep, fierce, hatred.

In any case, the theme this week was songs from the years the contestants were born. Once I finished crying after realizing that the oldest contestant was born the year I started high school (Danny), I paid attention and found the performances to be a mixed bag of good and bad song choices.  Aaaaaaand, here are the results:

First off, Adam graciously thanks Simon for giving him a standing ovation — the first he’s ever given a performer — that we didn’t see (Bitter? Me? Very.). Adam is called to his feet along with Kris and Anoop. Adam finally gets his feedback from Randy and the Paulas, who didn’t even get to comment last night, and they basically say, yeppers, his moving version of “Mad World” was standing O worthy. Adam is safe, because even without seeing him perform, America knows he’s the one who should win this.

Kris sang ”All She Wants to Do is Dance” and generally underwhelmed the judges.  Anoop did “True Colors” and generally wowed the judges. Anoop, illogically, is sent to the center stage as the first of the Bottom Three.  All righty, then.

We take a break for Flo Rida to perform “Right Round” and my 12-year-old dances around to it like a monkey on crack, so I guess it’s a pretty good performance.

Back to the results. Danny sang a groovy version of “Stand By Me” to general acclaim and is all safe and stuff. Then Matt, who sang “Part-Time Lover” really, really well (although the wee silly hat made a reappearance) and was highly, if briefly, praised by the rushed judges, is also safe.  Scott sang, “The Search is Over” while inexplicably playing the electric guitar and reached so high for some of the notes that he dislocated his voice. He’s sent to the Stools of Sorrow with Anoop, and deservedly so.

Allison and Lil are asked to please rise. Allison sang a totally kickass version of, “I Can’t Make You Love Me” that the judges adored and Lil sang a really karaoke version of “What’s Love Got To Do With It” that the judges super-duper hated. Allison is safe and Lil is in the Bottom Three, and all is right with the world with that decision. I mean, Lil even imitated Tina Turner’s weird little high-heel rocking dance that only Tina Turner can do without looking like a total doof. Lil’s got a super voice, but she’d better step it up ten notches if she wants to stick around.

Break time for Kelly Pickler. Wow, from Flo Rida to Kelly “I just fell of the turnip truck onto this stage” Pickler? Bizarre. Kelly and her magically-enhanced bosoms strut around in a wee silver dress and stupidly high heels, singing some country thing. My 12-year-old gets a soda in the kitchen.

Anoop, Lil, and Scott are brought forth for judgement. Lil is sent back to the Couch of Contentment. We learn that only 30K votes separate Anoop and Scott, with the votes going in favor of Anoop. So Scott has to sing for his save. No guitar tonight, which is probably for the best, since he ain’t exactly Mark Knopfler (look it up, children). He sings while the judges pretend to consider. Kara and Paula are on their feet rocking out, and it is clear that they’re doing it to make Scotty feel better and prep him for the big goodbye.

Simon tells Scott that two of them think he should stay and two think he should go. Yeah, not buying it, but nice of Simon to say. Simon pretty much flat-out tell him that they don’t want to blow their one save on him when Adam…excuse me, one of the other talented folks waiting in the wings…might need it another week. The decision is (supposedly) left to Simon and he tells Scott buh-bye.

We get the review of Scott’s time on the show and that evil abomination of “Home Sweet Home.” Paula adds a public service announcement about why Scott’s so awesomely awesome for being on the show and inspiring others with challenges and yeah, yeah, you’re all great humanitarians, we get it, Idol.

And then there were seven.